Well, I did it. I actually won NaNoWriMo this year. Shocked the hell out of me, actually. Now my aching fingers and wrists may actually be able to recuperate, or they will suffer more as I start writing out Christmas Cards and playing various computer games until ridiculously early in the morning.
Fun news though. I'm considering starting my own Etsy shop. I will have a job soon! And hopefully after I while I will be able to work from home, which causes me all sorts of trouble seeing as I have Facebook at home. Nevertheless, I am able to get what needs to be done finished, mostly without trouble.
In all seriousness though, my life seems jumbled up right now. I feel like I'm closing in on 50 years old, even though I'm only 22. I look in the mirror and I'm surprised my hair is not gray sometimes. My anxiety is going through the roof and making me sick and angry at everyone. Most days I just want to curl up into a ball and be left alone. I have to watch a woman who I consider closer to me than my own mother die, and die slowly at that, because she won't take care of herself. Husband and I try our hardest to help, but it just seems that our help is going in one ear and out of the other. I hardly have any close connection to my parents at all, and sometimes Husband's family is a little unbearable. After marrying Husband, my friends are pretty much nonexistent. I dropped out of school until our family can get back on its feet and it's killing me inside. I love school. I feel so useless right now.
And yes, I do realize that there is no one reading this. Maybe that's a good thing. I don't like people I know finding out just how messed up and scared I am on the inside, and the fact that none of them read this allows me to just vent. Kind of. I still hold back about things. A lot of things.
Whatever.
