So, Valentine's Day is coming up. That dreadful time of year where everything is covered in Pepto Bismal pink and little naked men with wings and arrows (i.e. Cupid) are sprinkled all over the place. So many people make such a big deal about this day created by Hallmark and various candy companies...and I'm guilty too.
Is the reason why I'm so into Valentine's Day this year is because I have someone to share it with. No, that's not it.
The truth is that dear Fiance has plans for next Monday, and refuses to tell me what they are. I abhor surprises. I HAVE to know what will happen. Finding out surprises becomes an obsession that I will not rest until I know what it is, and he knows this. He takes a sick pleasure in my trying to coax, force, bash the answer out of him. And he doesn't even crack.
However, this presents a problem for me. I have no idea what I'm going to do for him. What in the hell would I do for him? A card? Lela will shred it. Food? I'm pretty much a one dish kinda gal, and that is mac and cheese. I have no clue.
His suggestion is a backscratcher and a blowjob. My friend has suggested in covering myself with chocolate sauce, but I'm not a big fan of that idea either. And so far, his suggestion will probably mean the most out of everything, sadly enough.
And the Little Miss doesn't even know what Valentine's Day is, but will probably accept it as Candy Day and drive us insane on a sugar high, while pointing out that everything is pink. Especially while pointing out that everything is pink.
Like my $50 perfume, which she dumped out all over the bed last night. Grrrrrr.
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